The next 10 trendy retro haircuts

In Entertainment by DJ Pangburn / March 26, 2012

Now that retro haircuts and barber shops/speakeasies are all the rage, from the various Mad Men cuts and the pompadour to every groomed look in between (what’s next, articulated pubic hair and bespoke merkins?), here are a few haircuts people could sport to separate themselves from the mob.

But, we’re not leaving out the ladies here. With a full range of hairstyles perloined from the 20th century, women will need a few more options, too.

Beau Brummell
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts

George Bryan Brummell, or Beau Brummell, was a famous English dandy. He reportedly enjoyed a five-hour dressing period. Splendid.

Pippi Longstocking
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts
Astrid Lindgren’s character Pippi Långstrump, or Pippi Longsticking, or Pippilotta Delicatessa Windowshade Mackrelmint Ephraim’s Daughter Longstockin, is one of the quirkiest girl characters ever created, so she fits right into the contemporary milieu.

Like many girls these days, she has a box of treasures (vintage ornaments), wears handmade clothes, but she also has a monkey and a horse; which is to say, she’s the perfect symbol of quirk this side of Miranda July.

Aubrey Beardsley
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts
If you spent any time in art school, you know Aubrey Beardsley and his artwork. This hairstyle would work best if you resemble Beardsley or Bradford Cox of Deerhunter.

Jennifer Aniston
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts

By now, enough time has elapsed from season 1 of “Friends” for Jennifer Aniston’s hairstyle to be once again en vogue. The early ’90s retro movement is already in full swing with guys and girls rocking Nirvana-inspired grunge duds. A quirky girl will surely attempt “The Rachel” at some point. Hell, it’s probably already being done.

Joachim Murat
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts

Brother-in-Law to Napoleon, Joachim Murat, was the Grand Duke of Berg and the King of Naples, and also an impeccably-dressed and coiffed man. But he also had the balls to be a cavalry commander. His hairstyle is not unlike that worn by Brian May of Queen and other rockers in the 1970s, so there is some pop culture cache for this cut.

Peg Bundy
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts
Peg Bundy’s hair, a nod to both the ’60s Bouffant and the big hair ’80s, should by all estimation be a trend. It shares some similarities with the B-52’s, who sported the Beehive, so there’s some indie cred there, of course.

Alejandro Jodorowsky
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts

Lest readers assume that the hip retro hairstyles are limited to shorter dandified cuts, Alejandro Jodorowsky’s electrified hair in “El Topo” could well become the next trend.

Bette Davis
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts
In the film “Jezebel,” Bette Davis sported ringlets. It’s a wonder this style hasn’t already been appropriated by someone like Lana Del Rey.

Ultimate Warrior
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts
Oddly, the ’80s cock rock cut hasn’t lit up the retro haircut firmament yet—but it will.

A full range of these haircuts were sported in the debaucherous decade, but WWF wrestler the Ultimate Warrior’s ‘do might be the best. Of course, it may have something to do with the accompanying face paint and the Warrior’s extended stream-of-consciousness soliloquies. You dig him because to hear the wrestler speak was like being administered several grams of psilocybin and anabolic steroids at once, thus making him ironically cool.

Lee Miller
The next 10 trendy retro haircuts
Most of the foregoing female hairstyles were offered up in jest, but there is one that is legimately great, and that is the hair worn by Lee Miller when she was Man Ray’s muse. She later turned out to be a highly-talented photographer herself and war correspondent during World War II.

[Additional writing by Kody Pangburn]