We all learned late yesterday evening that bath salts played no part in Miami’s face-eating zombie, who was thought to be under the influence of salts when he flew into a cannibalistic rage. So this morning we’re balancing the news karma with a story in which a different type of drug addiction does actually play into some crazy behavior.

Two “self-described heroin addicts” in eastern Missouri stole a truck loaded with 2,000 mice that were to be used for medical research. Their plan behind the move isn’t fleshed out in any kind of satisfying manner in this quick report from Fox News, but it does say they “took the truck to help support their heroin addictions.”

Maybe the plan was to hold the mice for ransom?

While Rudy Eugue, the Miami Cannibal, was found to have trace amounts of marijuana in his system, weed famously stays in the bloodstream for weeks, so there’s no evidence to support he was under the influence when he attacked his victim. Stealing 2,000 mice in order to hold them for ransom money, on the other hand, absolutely sounds like an idea hatched while baked on a Cheech and Chong-approved doob.

Sounds like these guys had a heart, too. When the truck was tracked with GPS and apprehended it was discovered the “truck’s driver had left it running to keep the cargo cool. The mice, valued at $10,000 were unharmed.”