One thing you can’t fault Taco Bell for is coming up with original ideas that to any sane human being sound absolutely terrible. It is kind of like the head of product development just hired a bunch of high 15 year-olds and asked them what they felt like eating. Doritos as a taco shell? Check. Mountain Dew as a breakfast drink? Check.
Unfortunately for us it has actually worked. The Doritos Loco Tacos were the most successful product launch in Taco Bell’s history. And not one to sit on its laurels, Taco Bell is going at it again. This time they are just throwing everything on their menu that was not already in a tortilla in a tortilla. Nachos, chicken or a loaded baked potato will all soon be on menus around the world in a tortilla. Taco Bell calls these new items “loaded grillers“—look for them at your local Taco Bell in the coming weeks. (And note that “grillers” is not actually a word.)
Maybe they have been inspired by the Thanksgiving tradition of throwing a bird inside a bird inside a bird. Every year my dad has the great idea of trying to get a turdcuken but thankfully is too busy with his work schedule to go through with it. Maybe as a pendent I will buy him all three of these “loaded grillers” this year. Really guys, if we were not fat enough already, carbs within carbs within carbs should help the cause. Who really wants to eat a baked potato within a tortilla? No really I implore you to get at me on Twitter and let me know if you actually like this idea.
These items are being pushed by Taco Bell as wraps, which once again begs the $50 million dollar question: what the fuck is the difference between a wrap and a burrito? Along with the new announcement of “loaded grillers” Taco Bell is expanding its desert menu. Were you always pissed off that they had Cinnamon Twists but no churro? Well you are in luck now because you can get both of them for under a dollar at your local store. Also for your caloric needs they will be adding a cookie sandwich for those with a little bit more room in the tummy.
So there you have it, America—you really can have it all. If you are like me and can’t figure out what type of carbohydrates I want for food at 2 in the morning now you can just order them all. Talk about a score.
Follow Kevin Camps @kpcamps.