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6 mindblowing M. Night Shyamalan plot twists we missed in ‘She’s All That’

Jun 13, 2013

I cannot tell you how excited I was when I heard last night that M. Night Shamyalan, director of such classics as “The Sixth Sense” and, um, “After Earth,” actually ghostwrote the 90s teen classic “She’s All That.” Which, in my opinion, is clearly his greatest work ever.

Given that Shyamalanadingdong is known for his crazy plot twists, I decided to rewatch the movie more carefully (for work!) to see if I could uncover any heretofore undiscovered twists that I had previously missed. PREPARE TO BE ASTOUNDED!

1. Taylor Vaughn is some kind of leprechaun or something

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EVIDENCE: Usher refers to her as “magically delicious”– a term one normally hears in reference to a certain kind of leprechaun-themed cereal. Then right after that, Freddie Prinze, Jr is all “The Taylor Vaughan you just described is an illusion, a myth.” Also, her name rhymes with Leprechaun.

Later on, Matthew Lillard is all “I have an audition for a new Spelling drama at 2 and I don’t want to smell like your spit.” Human spit does not smell, but probably leprechaun spit does.

2. Usher is either god or some kind of puppetmaster using a secret mind control device to manipulate all the people in the movie into doing exactly what he says

EVIDENCE: Although his actual interaction with the other people in the school is limited, he narrates everything that is going on in their lives over the school loudspeaker. Weirdly, he is also never named. At prom, he directs everyone in a perfectly choreographed dance to Fatboy Slim’s “Rockafeller Skank.” They are all clearly under his control. Whether he has magical powers or some kind of secret device to control them, I am not sure.

To be noted is the fact that this exact same “Rockafeller Skank” dance happens in another Freddie Prinze, Jr movie, “Boys and Girls.” It is possible that Usher’s god-like influence extends far beyond this movie alone.

3. Both Brock Hudson/Matthew Lillard and Taylor Vaughan are were cursed by a gypsy disguised as a tattoo artist in Daytona Beach who wanted to punish them for being vain, and the tattoo ink she used caused them all of their terrible personality traits to multiply to the nth degree so that everyone can see how terrible they are.

EVIDENCE: Mostly the fact that they both got tattoos (Lillard had one of his own face!) and then kept getting increasingly horrible throughout the movie. One would assume that Taylor was not like, that horrible before this, or that people didn’t notice it as much, but throughout the movie her reprehensibleness becomes more and more clear. Obvious cause? Cursed tattoo.

4. The actual moral of the story is that white people are totally the worst

Shes All That Freddie Prinze Jr. Paul Walker Gabrielle Union Dule Hill Lil Kim 6 mindblowing M. Night Shyamalan plot twists we missed in Shes All That

EVIDENCE: Ok, maybe not such a classic Shyamalan twist, but like, I’m halfway through the movie right now, and pretty much the only nice people in the whole thing are Dule Hill, Gabrielle Union and Lil’ Kim. Even Lanie is basically kind of a jerk for a most of it, and is pretty judgmental in her own right.

The whole movie is really weird when it comes to race issues. You’ve got the cats I mentioned above, and then unnamed Usher/God/DJ, and then the random three black dudes freestyling about how super cool Laney is and how she should be prom queen.

Also, the only nice white people are Laney’s friend… whose name is Jesse Jackson, and Freddie Prinze, Jr’s sister who ends up hooking up with him at prom. Not sure why she is at prom because she doesn’t go to that school. As she also acts as Laney’s Fairy Godmother make-over wise, it is possible that she is somehow in cahoots with Usher.

5. The whole thing actually exists WITHIN the Buffyverse

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EVIDENCE: Ok, so the first thing I noticed was that Freddie Prinze, Jr was all “Don’t wig, you’re wigging, this is major wiggage” to Laney Boggs about something. That is OBVIOUS Buffyspeak.

THEN, I see this. Sarah Michelle Gellar refusing fresh ground pepper from Macaulay Culkin’s  brother who plays Laney Boggs’ brother.

But what really seals the deal? I was wondering why the campus looked so familiar. GUESS WHY? It is SUNNYDALE. It was filmed at the same school Buffy was filmed at. So probably, like half of the people in this movie are vampires. PROBABLY USHER.

6. And the kicker? LANEY BOGGS WAS SECRETLY HOT THE WHOLE ENTIRE TIME!

131 6 mindblowing M. Night Shyamalan plot twists we missed in Shes All That

 

132 6 mindblowing M. Night Shyamalan plot twists we missed in Shes All That

133 6 mindblowing M. Night Shyamalan plot twists we missed in Shes All That

EVIDENCE: Ok, so what I’m thinking here is that, like the previously mentioned tattoos, these glasses were totally cursed. Wearing them, for some reason, caused people to think that she was super hideous and unattractive, even though Rachel Leigh Cook is obviously super hot and very attractive. Who is to blame? I blame Alexis Arquette! Yes, Alexis Arquette played the crazy guy from Laney’s performance art piece. So, I believe that it was all part of some secret art experiment/conspiracy. Somehow.


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