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Chinese ghostbuster arrested for exorcising woman’s ‘haunted vagina’ with his penis

Aug 29, 2013

Don’t you hate it when you’re sweet on your boss, you go to a ghost hunter for help – because duh! Why wouldn’t you? – and the ghost hunter tells you that the only cure for your haunted vagina is his penis? We’ve all been there!

Which is why the story of Chinese ghostbuster Huang Jianjun’s arrest is hardly remarkable. Here are the details of this classic story repeating itself all over again from The Global Times (though, surely, you don’t need to hear this one for the umpteeth time!):

“A self-proclaimed “ghostbuster” was arrested in Guangzhou, Guangdong Province after he charged a young woman 20,000 yuan ($3,279) to exorcise the ghosts in her vagina with his penis.

Police arrested Huang Jianjun on August 1 after the woman, A Xin, called police one day after having sex with Huang, reported the Southern Metropolis Daily…

Huang then convinced A Xin to have intercourse after explaining that ghosts in her vagina are preventing her boss from falling in love with her – ghosts he could only catch with his penis. Huang explained that he had sacrificed his virginity for the exorcism.”

As we all know, this kind of spectral assault isn’t without precedent*. Jianjun is just the latest in a long line of men and women practicing apparitional intercourse. Some of the most well known examples can be found below.

Of course, everyone’s favorite paranormal pair, Sam Wheat and Molly Jensen, is pictured above. And then there’s Dr. Beverly Crusher being seduced by a ghost in an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation.

MacGruber’s graveyard sex scene with his late wife.

And, of course, Dan Aykroyd’s character in Ghostbusters gets that… um… ghost job.

ghostbusters main Chinese ghostbuster arrested for exorcising womans haunted vagina with his penis

*Please note that all previously noted cases of haint humping are, in fact, fictional.

 

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