Chelsea Clinton refuses to go away, is writing a children’s book

Today, in I Thought I Told You People To Stay In The Woods news: Chelsea Clinton is writing a children’s book, most likely to lay the groundwork for her — nooooo! — political career.

Titled “She Persisted” in a nod to Mitch McConnell’s widely memed attempt to silence Elizabeth Warren, the book will share the stories of “13 American women who changed the world” in the face of adversity, including Harriet Tubman, Helen Keller, and Oprah Winfrey. She’s also hinted at a cameo from a certain presidential candidate whose contributions to racialized austerity, permanent imperial warfare, and the election of Donald Trump were nothing if not world-changing.

The book’s announcement was accompanied by the type of hollow empowerment-speak that could only signal a political run is imminent:

“I wrote this book for everyone who’s ever wanted to speak up but has been told to quiet down, for everyone who’s ever been made to feel less than,” said Clinton in a statement. “The 13 women in She Persisted all overcame adversity to help shape our country—sometimes through speaking out, sometimes by staying seated, sometimes by captivating an audience. With this book, I want to send a message to young readers around the country—and the world—that persistence is power.”

Fact check: Some ideas people speak up about are bad, like the one that says what this country needs right now is more Clintons sucking at politics.

I’m not saying there should not be children’s books about the contributions of Harriet Tubman, who was not afraid to defy unjust laws in service of human rights, or Helen Keller, who, in addition to being an “inspiration,” was a big, old commie. The sooner kids learn about these things, the better. I’m just asking, should they really be written by the scion to a neoliberal fail-dynasty for the sole purpose of extending said dynasty’s already-too-long life?

They should not.

[Photo: Getty]