Does Paz De La Huerta Have To Cut A Bitch? Yes She Does.
“Boardwalk Empire” actress, iron-livered sex kitten Paz De La Huerta was involved in a bar brawl at The Standard Hotel in New York last night after throwing a glass (and connecting! and drawing blood!) at the leg of reality “star” Samantha Swetra.
Who is Samantha Swetra? Apparently she was on an MTV show called “The City,” which I’m sure was indeed a show of some kind, despite the rich fact that I had to Google both her name and the name of this “show.” Did they mean “show” in the Vaudevillian sense of the word? Does Samantha Swetra do backflips while someone plays a mean ragtime standard?
I digress. Either that or my editor has whittled this down to an actual news piece. Anyway, the story goes that Paz was making drunken winky-faces at a man in Samantha’s entourage (she has an entourage! Oh yeahhh! Oh yeahhh! Vince is still in the movie! Something something Turtle!), which included modern-day Edie Sedgwick / permanent cultural footnote Ms Lindsay Lohan.
Apparently Samantha Sw… sorry… I still have no idea who this supposed star actually is… Swerta? Am I getting that right? Swerta made snide comments to Paz who proceeded to trip because as we all know about Paz:
- She is drunk a lot.
- She is awesome a lot.
Fulfilling her aforementioned numerical listing to a tee, Paz then clocked Samantha in the nose with a right hook, and side-chucked her glass at Samantha’s leg, which exploded. The glass, I mean. Paz was then escorted out by security, while Ms Lohan picked broken glass out of her failed reality starlet friend’s leg. How often do you get to type that sentence? [Editors note: about once every six months]
So what did we learn in all of this? Don’t mess with Paz, man. While she might be the human incarnate of the Tazmanian Devil cartoon, she has what many actress don’t: screen presence. Hell, we don’t know if she’s going to Frances Farmer out, so why not just enjoy the living shit out of her while we can?
She’s currently on HBO‘s “Boardwalk Empire,” and hopefully many more things to come. Switch to water every three drinks, girl!
Again: Samantha who?
March 23, 2011 at 10:19 pm, Anonymous said:
One day when Paz least expects is she will come across a crate of tequila with the words scribbled on it- ‘please drink to abandon.’ At that very moment Paz will wake up from her nighmare and rinse the fear in an empty martini glass before adding a touch of last night’s fist blood and vermouth stuck in her purse.
http://scallywagandvagabond.com/2011/03/my-hero-paz-got-arrested-last-night-for-starting-a-drunken-brawl/