Unnamed source says The Smiths will reunite

Music-News dubiously claims today that The Smiths will reform this fall. Okay, here are a few reasons why this is probably bullshit and why, if they did reform, it would be complete horseshit.

The two key Smiths, Morrissey and Johnny Marr, the dynamic duo who in the span of less than five years wrote and recorded some of the most important pop songs ever, have vehemently denied any possibility of reuniting for years. For one, Morrissey and Marr, while on speaking terms, are far from friends, and the key factor in what made the band such a glowing success on stage and in the studio was their chemistry and general enjoyment of each other’s company. That being said, the relationship between Morrissey and drummer Mike Joyce has crumbled considerably, with Moz having once wished on Joyce “nothing but the worst for the rest of his life” (from “The Importance of Being Morrissey” documentary). The harsh feelings towards Joyce stem from a legal battle that Morrissey lost to Joyce, who sued him for unpaid royalties in the late ’90s, a court case Moz detailed in “Sorrow Will Come in the End” off “Maladjusted.”

So aside from that, Johnny Marr who has probably been the softest on the idea of touring with The Smiths, left it off recently by saying that he would only do it if the British coalition stepped down. Morrissey, however, has been the hardest on the concept, having told the NME, “People always ask me about reunions and I can’t imagine why. It baffles me. The past seems like a distant place and I’m pleased with that. I feel very much of now.” He also once stated he’d rather eat his own testicles in favor of playing with them again.

He’s completely right in how ridiculous the prospect would be. If The Smiths were to reunite, it would obviously be solely motivated by money, and why would we want to see that? These were the songs that changed your lives, sure, but they were made by young men with noble intentions. Wanting so see them bop around the stage as puppets delivering the hits is not something I personally ever want to see. Yes, it’s a shame we can’t see them play again, but that inability is part of the allure of the group. A tour, or even a pairing of simply Morrissey and Marr with an unnamed rhythm section, would be watching a lie on stage.

Plus, have you seen Moz’s live band? They kick major ass.┬áHe has however said recently though that he’s been having trouble scoring a record deal, so you can’t really say it’s impossible for him to have a change of heart and ideals.

Check out a clip from The Smiths’ last show together in December of 1986.

Morrissey — “William, It Was Really Nothing”

UPDATE: NME says the reunion rumors have been refuted by the band.

UPDATE: “The rumour of the Smiths reunion is untrue. It’s not happening.” Via Johnny Marr’s Facebook.