Chick-fil-A now totally cool with gays

Just kidding gays, Chick-fil-A totally loves you.

The chicken joint has finally agreed to stop donations to anti-gay organizations like Focus on the Family. Chick-fil-A has given millions to these groups in the past, some of which qualify as hate groups.

The LGBT advocacy group The Civil Rights Agenda released a statement indicating that after months of negotiations the company’s charitable donation arm, the WinShape Foundation, will take “a much closer look at the organizations it considers helping, and in that process will remain true to its stated philosophy of not supporting organizations with political agendas.”

According to company literature Chick-fil-A’s “stated philosophy” has actually always been apolitical. That obviously got drowned out by the their president this summer saying “we are very much supportive of the family—the biblical definition of the family unit” and saying he was “guilty as charged” in opposing the rights of gays to marry. The semi-holidays dedicated to gay haters and pro-gay protests made it a lightning rod for gay rights issues this summer.

A spokesman told BuzzFeed, “We have no agenda, policy or position against anyone. We have a 65-year history of providing hospitality for all people… and serving and valuing everyone regardless of their beliefs or opinions.”

Donating millions to groups dedicated to blocking the rights of gay people isn’t exactly “valuing everyone” equally. But the company must have come to its senses. Gay people eat chicken, too—what business wants to alienate any potential dollars? Now it can poison everyone equally with its nasty fast-food chicken.