Portland school declares PB&J sandwiches ‘racist’

Today in “White People Ruin Everything” news a Portland school board has said that peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are racist.

Let me type that out again.

PB&J – or, peanut (p) butter (b) and (&) jelly (j) sandwiches – is racist.

Right-wing blogs like The Breitbart Report and Glenn Beck’s The Blaze are (actually) salivating at the mouth (probably because sandwiches are delicious) due to the fact that this is a legitimate example of political correctness going too far… and whooooo doesn’t like people being overly political correct? Everyone ever in the entire world.

Apparently the issue has something to do with “white privilege” which to my knowledge as a card-carrying white person (since ’84!) means that we get free Starbucks on our birthday and 20% of at certain Banana Republic locations. What it actually means is that white people are more privileged (i.e: born into more privelege simply by being white.) Which, sadly, is somewhat true. Racism is still alive and well in America and most white people, for the most part, have no conscious knowledge of their privilege. But that doesn’t mean you should bring sandwiches into this fight.

For those of you still confused by the issue, allow me to be a journalist copy and paste this paragraph from the Breitbart Report article which outlines some of the malarky:

Dr. Verenice Gutierrez, a principal with Oregon’s Portland Public Schools, has become convinced that America’s “white culture” negatively influences educators’ world view and the manner in which they teach their students.

So I guess that means “Everybody Loves Raymond” is totally racist, too. Carry on…

For instance, last year a teacher in the district presented a lesson that included a reference to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Gutierrez says that by using sandwiches as an illustration, the teacher was engaged in a very subtle form of racism.

“What about Somali or Hispanic students, who might not eat sandwiches?” asked Gutierrez, according to Portland Tribune. “Another way would be to say: ‘Americans eat peanut butter and jelly, do you have anything like that?’ Let them tell you. Maybe they eat torta. Or pita.”

I see the point they are trying to make – that we should be more concious of others – but they are going about it with an incredibly bad way, concentrating on a leaf when there’s a goddam forest fire all around them. Maybe they do eat a torta or a pita but jesus fucking christ we are talking about a goddam sandwich here.

This is the kind of liberal brainwanking that makes people hate liberals. It is the same thought process that the GOP uses, like imposing one’s religious beliefs onto everyone else and then calling it “infringing on religious rights” when we ask you to stop being a fucking asshole – we, as the hopefully more sensible party, shouldn’t be imposing clueless, blindingly self-unaware rhetoric onto others.

I’m all for more bipartisanal talk in this country, but making sandwiches a debate point? Fuck. No.