Texas congressman: ‘If babies had guns, they wouldn’t be aborted’

Remember on Thursday, just 24 hours ago, when I was completely joking about arming babies and toddlers because of all the toddler shootings this week? Well, Texas GOP congressman Steve Stockman one-upped me with this whimsical tweet:

Texas congressman: 'If babies had guns, they wouldn't be aborted'

Haha! Get it? Because then they could just shoot the evil harlot planning to abort them from within the womb. Which isn’t a difficult thing at all for a blob of cells to do. And then, said blob of cells could definitely survive on its own.

The take home message here is that guns are awesome, abortions are bad and violence against women is hee-larious. Vote Stockman!