McGruff the Crime Dog gets 16 years in jail for stockpile of grenade launchers, weed

John R. Morales,  who portrayed the famous “McGruff the Crime Dog,” has apparently failed to heed his own advice. The 41-year-old actor was arrested in his home three years ago in Galveston, Texas, after police seized “1,000 marijuana plants, 27 weapons – including a grenade launcher, and 9,000 rounds of ammunition from his home” and has now been sentenced to 16 years in prison. Which does not really give one confidence in that whole “right to a speedy trial” thing we hear so much about.

His undoing? ACTUAL CRIME DOGS. Seriously. Drug-sniffing dogs apparently smelled pot on him when he was pulled over one time, and then the police raided his home. Which is actually pretty messed up when you think about it. Do police usually raid your home because a dog smelled pot on you? Yeesh.

Personally, as much as I am clueless as to what someone might need an actual grenade launcher for (probably to hunt deer, right?), and as much as I hate guns, 16 years seems like an excessive amount of time for this kind of thing. However, the judge was creeped out by Morales and stated “Everything I read about you makes you seem like a scary person.”

Which, sure. Dude has a grenade launcher and ridiculous arsenal of weapons. He very likely is a scary person. I would hesitate to ask him over for tea and crumpets. Yet, 16 years still seems excessive given that he never actually used the weapons. A much lighter sentence, a seizing of all the weapons and probation that prevented him from stockpiling them again seems a bit more appropriate to me.

All things aside, I am going to be singing this all day now.