Woman arrested for smacking spatula on someone’s ass
In Easthampton, Massachusetts, an 18-year-old faces multiple assault and battery charges for allegedly extinguishing a cigarette onto another woman’s right ass cheek–then smacking the left side with a spatula.
And the spatula left a mark.
Malissa Robert was arrested by Westfield Police on Monday and had admitted to the heinous acts which “left a solid red impression on the victim’s skin,” according to MassLive.com.
Robert was released from jail after posting $100 bail. Which hardly seems fair. She should at least spring for a hemorrhoid pillow for the victim, no?
The victim, age 20, was passed out at the time of the spanking.
This was not the only recent spatula-related violence that has been reported in Obama’s America. Back in July, a Pennsylvania man stepped to his ex-girlfriend’s husband with a cooking utensil over a Walmart gift card. The aggressor went to jail for aggravated assault charges and was released on $15,000 bail. No cigarettes were burned into anyone’s asses at the time.