Piers Morgan runs his mouth about George Michael’s having ‘slept with 500 men’

A story is going around the British tabloids about how George Michael had 500 lovers over the course of seven years. Its source is not some hustler looking for money, but the late singer’s “friend” (WHY?) Piers Morgan.

In the weird diary column he writes for The Mail On Sunday, the TV personality and notorious blowhard recalls a dinner party at a mutual friend’s house at which Michael was “outrageously indiscreet,” as well as “hugely amusing, unpredictable, provocative and entertaining.” For Morgan, this meant he talked with his friends about his sex life, answered a hypothetical question about which woman he’d most like to sleep with, relayed an amusing story about Rod Stewart and said something thoughtful about his infamous bathroom incident. What a volatile wild card.

Via The Daily Mail:

“He was on outrageously indiscreet form, revealing that he’d slept with 500 men in the previous seven years, was currently being blackmailed by a French male prostitute (‘I forgot to pay him!’), would most like to have sex with Elizabeth Taylor of all the women in history, never regretted being caught propositioning a policeman in a Beverly Hills public toilet (‘I was only sorry for offending some of my fans’) and insisted Rod Stewart once served Dairylea triangles at a Los Angeles dinner party claiming it was rare French cheese.”

He also scandalized Piers by asking if he’d ever thought about experimenting with men, a thing straight dudes who are not totally boring do all the time.

“Then he became the first celebrity to ever render me speechless by saying: ‘Come on Piers, I bet you’ve fancied experimenting with men?’

‘I most certainly have not, George!’ I said, in my most indignant heterosexual voice.”

Of course, Michael was publicly open about his sexual habits, so it’s not like Morgan sold out a dead man’s secrets or anything. But I do find it telling that Morgan talked about someone he was ostensibly friends with like he was some sort of larger-than-life clown. He did not even mention Michael’s two longterm boyfriends, whom he would have known if he was actually friends with him.

The headlines might be about Michael’s 500 lovers, but my main takeaway is that Michael was way too cool to be anything more than acquaintances with Morgan, a grown man who talks about sex like he’s 12. Piers might have thought they were friends, but Michael probably thought of him more as that pudding-faced ninny he liked to fuck with at parties.

[Photo: Getty]