Florida man seeks threesome to ‘ride out the hericane’

UPDATE, September 11: This Craigslist posting has been removed by its author, but we took screenshots. No news on the threesome.

As the world ends in 17 different ways, just wanted to throw a bone to my dude in Jacksonville with the fly gold chain and a comfortable home 400 miles north of the Florida Keys.

This very single Florida man is a healthy liver who doesn’t smoke or drink but is 420 friendly because hell, times are crazy. Avid fan of matte hair gel and throwback wallpaper. He’s 50 with a touch of gray, young enough to use Craigslist but too old to play games.

Five feet, eight inches tall, 160 pounds, eyes as blue as Irma’s. Lonely and loves to cuddle. Always wanted to be with two women at once, so if you’re fleeing the storm with a friend, ladies, hit his line with pictures and phone numbers. Just know this isn’t long-term. The hurricane should pass by Tuesday. Must dig goatees.

Shooters gotta shoot.

[h/t: April | Craigslist]