Simmons Trumps Travolta in Flight Safety Video

Which dried-up celebrity is better suited to inform you about flight safety information?  The one who makes it the most FUN FUN FUN!

Forget about those drab flight-safety information demonstrations before departure. According to the Time News Feed, Richard Simmons has teamed up with Air New Zealand to get you “Fit to Fly.”

Despite the fact that the fitness guru is beginning to show his age, he’s still filled with the same pep and pizzaz you’d expect from a coke snorting disco dancer of the 70s.

Simmons isn’t the first celebrity to grace in-flight info videos. According to the NY Daily News, John Travolta recently teamed up with Qantas Airlines as a “flight ambassador.” In comparison to John Travolta’s video, Simmons appears highly unsuited as an in-flight information celebrity cameo. (Mind you, Travolta has been flying planes for about 40 years and has been involved with Qantas since 2002.)

But who cares about qualifications. No one pays attention to flight safety demonstrations anyway, especially when they’re as lackluster as Travolta’s performance.

What happened to the fire, Travolta? What happened to the dancing days of “Saturday Night Fever” and “Grease”? When we see a celebrity, we don’t just want their face and voice, we want their Hollywood gimmick. Throw in a movie line (“You just activated a nuclear warhead, my friend”), do a little dance, sing a song, something.

In this respect, Simmons really delivers. In the event of ditching, you may have no idea what the hell is going on or what to do, but at least you’ll have some fun lines to quote from the demonstration/workout video:

How to store excess baggage: “Stretch and slide, yea! You’re a giraffe!”

No smoking: “The captain says it’s time to kick butt!”

In the even of an emergency: “Come on everyone’s let’s pony!”