ted cruz

Ted Cruz doesn’t deny masturbating

Among other comments, Cruz described the porn viewing a "staffing issue." *rimshot*
In News by Drew Salisbury / September 12, 2017

Here’s Ted Cruz trying to explain away requesting federal aid for Harvey after voting against Sandy aid

Cruz maintains he supported Sandy relief but there was too much "pork" on the bill.
In Politics by Jordan Freiman / August 28, 2017

Republicans are skipping town for a month while healthcare hangs in the balance

Ted Cruz has got his speedo packed and is ready to get the fuck outta dodge.
In News by Jennifer M. Wood / August 4, 2017

Senators refuse to be Ted Cruz’s Secret Santa

Hark, the herald angels hate Ted Cruz.
In Politics by Tosten Burks / May 31, 2017

Sally Yates owns Ted Cruz

Ok, maybe "owns" is a bit dramatic for "reads conflicting legal statute," but whatever.

In News by Jordan Freiman / May 8, 2017

Ted Cruz wants El Chapo to pay for Trump’s stupid wall

The Justice Department is demanding $14 billion from the Mexican kingpin.
In News by Tosten Burks / April 25, 2017
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