Most stores have a strict return policy against items that have been hidden next to your vagina for three days.
Minnesota gets rather frigid during their long winter months. A heavy winter coat is a bound to be a staple of your cold-month wardrobe. For most people a big down jacket or an insulated wool coat would normally do the trick, but for about .1 percent of the population it would be unimaginable to leave the house in anything other than the comfort of some dead animals. Yes, I’m talking about fur coats — despised by PETA members and adored by hip hop moguls.
The only problem with fur (and especially mink) coats is their exorbitant prices make it nearly impossible for the common man or woman to purchase. However some people don’t see a lack of cash flow as a dead end, but rather a barrier that simply stands in their way. Recently in Bloomington, Minnesota a woman who was trying to look super duper fly during this upcoming winter season decided to treat herself to a $6,500 mink coat — by treat herself, I mean she stuffed the coat into her underwear when employees weren’t looking.
Cameras at the Alaskan Fur Company in Bloomington catch Stephanie Moreland taking a $6,5000 mink fur and stuffing it under her skirt seconds before a clerk walks by.
The worker is suspicious and stops her at the door.
Police are called, they don’t find the coat, but still make an arrest. Three days later, after the holiday weekend, a detective interviews her about the theft.
At first, she lies about the mink fur by saying, “I sold the coat.” But then police say she tries to use it as a way to avoid jail. Stehlik says, “That’s when she made the decision to take the coat out and give it to him.”
Moreland pulls the coat from her underpants and explains how she was able to walk out of the store. Stehlik says, “I’ll tell you why they didn’t check me, I pulled my pants down and they said you don’t have on panties?”
Police say the woman spent three days in jail before handing over the coat. The coat went undetected by officers for days.
Just a little advice: When stealing a $6,500 coat you need a better strategy than stuffing an entire winter coat down your pants. Not many people can hide a mink coat in their panties without being outrageously suspicious looking. Nevertheless I have to applaud Ms. Moreland for calling the store’s bluff—no employee was going to strip search her.
Moreland is now serving two years in jail for the theft. Something tells me the coat lost significant value after spending three days nestled in her netherregions.