Anderson Cooper to Jeffrey Lord: ‘If [Trump] took a dump on his desk you would defend it’
On Friday night’s edition of “Anderson Cooper 360,” our titular host tried to get professional Donald Trump stooge Jeffery Lord to admit that maybe Trump kind of fucked up by telling the Russian foreign minister that former FBI director James Comey is “a real nut job.” Lord, speaking from his hidden Ronald Reagan bunker, did not concur with Cooper, and instead made the argument that Trump can say whatever he wants. Cooper eventually got fed up and exclaimed that Lord would defend Trump even if “he took a dump on his desk.”
“You can’t defend what the president of the United States just said,” Cooper prompted Lord, incorrectly.
“I don’t care what he says to the Russians,” Lord said. “He’s the president of the United States. If he wants to say that, if Barack Obama wants to say whatever, if George Bush says I looked in his eyes-“
Cooper had heard enough at this point, and realized he clearly wasn’t going to get Lord to back down on this, so he just went ahead and explained why all of these interviews, chats, and panels with Lord are useless anyway. “If he took a dump on his desk you would defend it,” Cooper said.
“What?” a somewhat stunned and laughing Lord shot back.
“I mean, I don’t know what he would do that you would not defend,” Cooper reiterated.
Of course, Trump is supposedly too much of a germophobe to ever deliberately drop trow and defecate on the Resolute. He is, however, a 70-year-old man with extremely poor eating habits, so there’s always a chance Trump might mess his drawers. When that day comes, I look forward to Lord’s response.
UPDATE 10:22 PM: Cooper for some reason felt the need to apologize for this gentle ribbing of his colleague.
I regret the crude sentence i spoke earlier tonight and followed it up by apologizing on air. It was unprofessional. I am genuinely sorry.
— Anderson Cooper (@andersoncooper) May 20, 2017
[screen shot: CNN]