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Newt, Iran is not going to nuke Ohio

February 8th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Newt Gingrich steered clear of states holding elections yesterday to instead focus on Ohio, where he’s warning Buckeye State voters that Iran may soon attack them.

“You think about an Iranian nuclear weapon. You think about the dangers, to Cleveland, or to Columbus, or to Cincinnati, or to New York,” the presidential candidate said at a campaign stop today, the New York Times reports.

The former House Speaker went on, employing good old fashioned fear-mongering: “Remember what it felt like on 9/11 when 3,100 Americans were killed. Now imagine an attack where you add two zeros. And it’s 300,000 dead. Maybe a half-million wounded. This is a real danger. This is not science fiction. That’s why I think it’s very important that we have the strongest possible national security.”

First and foremost, Iran does not have the technology to strike the United States with a nuclear warhead. While the Islamic Republic is currently enriching uranium, perhaps for a bomb, there’s absolutely no evidence they’re building a long-range bomb, nor do they have existing weapons that can carry a radioactive load to the United States. Israel? Maybe. The U.S.? Most definitely not. Hell, their weapons can’t even reach Europe.

Second, if Iran could attack the United States, which they cannot, there is absolutely no way Ohio would be their first target. Sorry, Ohio, you’re just not a high level target for our enemies. Plus, Ohio is so deep into the United States that any missile would be intercepted before reaching the state.

Gingrich, you see, was simply using this impossible hypothetical to scare up voters, clearly hoping that playing on fears would bring him some much needed support. Hopefully voters are smart enough to see through this weak and poorly thought out ploy.

Android’s Iris, like Apple’s Siri, hates abortion

February 8th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Remember when Apple’s voice recognition app Siri refused to give directions to abortion clinics? Well, Verizon’s Android application Iris has the same socially conservative politics.

As Right Wing Watch and ThinkProgress report, little Iris also refuses to guide users toward abortion providers. But Iris goes one step further. While Siri simply refuses to give the information, Iris quotes the Bible to make her point.

“Abortion is wrong. The Lord has said ‘You shall not murder,’ (Exodus 20:13). The life that is growing within the mother is a child, a baby. The Bible looks at the life in the womb as a child,” Iris replies when asked whether abortion is wrong, and then ends with a cheery “Thanks!”

Asked “What makes abortion wrong,” Iris replies: “It takes away the right to live, to be happy, to be healthy…” The list goes on.

Right wingers like Family Research Council are celebrating Iris’ abortion opposition, but the rest of us — you know, the less draconian people who believe in a woman’s right to choose — are left to wonder why 21st century technology is so stuck in the 18th century.

Rick Santorum’s stunning sweep should scare Ron Paul supporters

February 8th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Rick Santorum had a super Tuesday. Long lingering at the back of the Republican presidential pack, the former Pennsylvania senator delivered a stunning upset by winning all three of yesterday’s electoral events.

In Missouri, he clinched 55% of the vote, far more than presumptive frontrunner Mitt Romney’s 25%; he took about 40% in Colorado, 5 points ahead of Romney, who won that state four years ago; and in Minnesota, another state Romney won during the 2008 race, Santorum captured 45% of the vote, followed by Ron Paul’s 27%, leaving Romney in the dust at only 17% of the vote, according to the Huffington Post.

The main takeaway here is that Romney lost big, but the secondary story is, or should be, the fact that socially conservative Rick Santorum’s wins represent something of a micro-battle between the Republican Party’s traditional ideological leanings and Ron Paul’s brand of Libertarianism. “Conservatism is alive and well in Missouri and Minnesota,” Santorum told a jubilant crowd last night. “Tonight was a victory for the voices of our party, conservatives and Tea Party people.” It was, therefore, a loss for Paul’s increasingly vocal voting bloc.

Libertarianism has been flexing its muscles in Republican circles for years, and Santorum’s campaign represents something of a throwback to the GOP’s most notable base, one that is inherently against the political ideas espoused by the likes of Ron Paul. In fact, Santorum has previously said he wants to route out Libertarianism all together.

“[I will] fight very strongly against libertarian influence within the Republican party and the conservative movement., he said last June. And in 2005, he remarked, “[Libertarians] have this idea that people should be left alone, be able to do whatever they want to do. Government should keep our taxes down and keep our regulation low and that we shouldn’t get involved in the bedroom, we shouldn’t get involved in cultural issues, you know, people should do whatever they want. Well, that is not how traditional conservatives view the world, and I think most conservatives understand that individuals can’t go it alone.”

Yes, that’s why conservatives like Santorum prescribe big government intervention on things like gay marriage, as seen in the federal Defense of Marriage Act, while Libertarians agree lawmakers should stay out of the bedroom.

Santorum’s wins, especially in Minnesota, expose the ongoing tensions between upstart Libertarians and old school conservatives, representing a micro-view of the infighting happening within the Republican Party. If he can’t be slowed down, then Santorum may officially trounce a movement that has for years been trying to build its support and influence. Santorum’s wins were probably something of a fluke, and it’s unlikely he’ll have similar success in the forthcoming races. But if he does, Ron Paul and his supporters will see a huge ideological setback, one that could severely damage their Libertarian movement for years to come.

More bad news for homophobes: Prop 8 unconstitutional

February 7th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

A federal appeals court today ruled that California’s Proposition 8, a ban on gay marriage, violates the U.S. Constitution.

According to the 9th circuit court of appeals, that popular vote “serves no purpose, and has no effect, other than to lessen the status and human dignity of gays and lesbians.”

It’s unclear how this ruling will play out: either there will be another relatively local hearing or it will immediately go to the Supreme Court. Either way, this case has national ramifications and gay Americans such as myself will soon have the opportunity to have our government recognize that our love is equally pure, worthy of recognition and beautiful as our straight counterparts.

While I may not marry a Romney son, I will be able to marry… I have someone in mind. He’s not wealthy, but he’s super hot and makes me happier than anyone ever in the world, and that’s good enough for me! Though I live in NYC, so can tie the knot if I want, I would rather wait until my queer comrades coast-to-coast can do the same. Because, you know, I believe marriage should be available to all Americans, federally and equally everywhere.

Hideous anti-gay group infiltrates Maryland school

February 7th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Let’s get this out of the way: I am gay. I have always been gay and I will always be gay, just as all LGBT have been and will always be born that way. That’s why I absolutely loathe groups like PFOX, which stands, ironically, for Parents And Friends Of Ex-Gays And Gays.

They’re an awful group that tries to convince people, particularly impressionable children, that they can “turn” straight. And that’s precisely what they did this week at a Maryland high school.

Local Fox News affiliate My Fox 5 reports that PFOX took advantage of this nonsensical non-profit status to include a proselytizing flier in report cards sent out by the Albert Einstein High School in Montgomery County, Maryland. In that flier, they declare, “According to mainstream psychological associations, there are no replicated scientific studies to support that a person can be born ‘gay.’”

They continue, “[There is] no “gay gene” or gay center of the brain has been found. No medical test exists to determine if a person is homosexual. Sexual orientation is based on feelings and is a matter of self-affirmation and public declarations.”

Yet, as the Washington Post points out, Attorney General Eric Holder noted to Congress last year, “While sexual orientation carries no visible badge, a growing scientific consensus accepts that sexual orientation is a characteristic that is immutable.” In fact, almost every single reputable medical group agrees there is a biological root for homosexuality and that “ex-gay” therapy leads to depression and, in some cases, suicide, so PFOX isn’t simply homophobic, they’re brain dead and heartless.

Many parents are understandably pissed about the flier. “Everything in this flyer make its sound like the goal is to be [an] EX-gay, [or an EX]-lesbian. It is not embracing of a different orientation,” said Karen Yount-Merrell, a social worker whose son attends the Einstein School. “It reiterates a societal view that there’s something ‘wrong’ with you, if you’re not in the norm. If you aren’t heterosexual. And teenagers have a hard enough time dealing with who they are and feeling good about themselves.”

Besides, if you want to see how well “ex-gay” therapies work, just look at Marcus Bachmann. He prescribes “ex-gay” therapies, which leads me to believe he may be an “ex-gay.” He ended marrying a megalomaniac Republican congresswoman, a straight fate worse than anything we gays could ever conjure.

I wish Mitt Romney’s sons were gay, especially Matthew

February 6th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Mitt Romney is super rich. Like, ultra rich: most estimates put the GOP White House hopeful candidate’s wealth at about $200-250 million. And like a true, trickle-down Republican, he’s spreading some of that sweet, sweet dough to his sons: CNN reports that the former Massachusetts governor’s five male offspring share a trust fund of about $100 million.

As if that’s not attractive enough, the Romney men are all pretty easy on the eyes. Yes, I know, a gay man praising this right-wing, homophobic (and anti-abortion!) political family’s collective cheek bones and genetics is completely debased, to say the least, but I can’t help it. (I also have a heart-on for Romney’s equally despicable former spokesman, Kevin Madden. He’s fine as hell.)

Sadly, none of Romney’s sons play for my team. Not that I know of, at least, and even if they did, I’m not sure how they would take to welcoming an non-Jesus believer between the sheets. This is too bad, because the one thing a financially struggling political journalist such as myself could use right now is a wealthy scion from a political family.

The Kennedy clan would definitely be an option, but despite the fact that there are about 500 of that Catholic clan, none are openly gay. Another handsome Democrat, Beau Biden, would be an option, but, again, he’s straight, and certainly not as wealthy as the Romney spawn. (Beau’s father, poor bastard Vice President Joe Biden, has only about $735,000, which the Romneys find in their cracks — couch cracks, I mean.)

Alas, I suppose I’ll have to give up on my shameful, once-secret lusting for the Romney boys, especially the most good looking one, 39-year old Matthew (far left, swoon!), although I guess they all mostly look alike, so I would settle for any of them, except maybe Craig. Now I’ll just have to find someone I find someone who stimulates me emotionally, sexually and intellectually, though not necessarily in that order. Yes, I’ll have to settle for someone I actually love. Ain’t them the breaks?!

Iran bans ‘The Simpsons,’ but anti-Ahmadinejad Superman still cool

February 6th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Iran’s government has no love for long-running television family “The Simpsons.” The independent newspaper Shargh reported today officials in the Islamic republic have forbidden the sale of Simpsons dolls because Homer, Marge, Bart and the rest “because these dolls are promoters of Western culture.” Barbie is also the “not fly” list compiled by the Institute for the Intellectual Development of Children and Young Adults’. Yes, even Princess Jasmine Barbie.

Oddly, the Los Angeles Times points out the superheroes Spider-Man and Superman action figures are still okay. Even though they’re both Western creations — hell, Superman fights for the “American way” — they “help oppressed people and they have a positive stance” and are therefore acceptable toys for Iranian youth. Clearly policy makers in Iran never read Action Comics #900, in which Superman gives up his honorary American citizenship because he participates in a Green Movement protest against tyrannical Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (see above).

“As a super-hero, as Metropolis’ protector, I’ve fought just about every threat imaginable… But the everyday degradations that humans suffer?… Thirst? Hunger? People being denied their basic human rights?” Superman explained at the time. “I’ve never been very effective at stopping things like that. And I want to be. So I showed up. In solidarity.”

Either Iranian officials are unaware of the Man of Steel’s adventure in their borders or are going by DC’s “New 52″ chronology, in which Superman never traveled to Iran. If that’s the case, they’re not only deranged oppressors, and therefore Superman’s natural enemy, but also huge comic book nerds.

Does Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein’s gay support make him more likable?

February 6th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Most of us associate financial titan Goldman Sachs with the subprime mortgage meltdown. They did, after all, bet on the forthcoming housing market crash, helping precipitate the global economic downturn. For that reason alone, Goldman Sachs remains one of the most reviled symbols of capitalist greed and apathy.

What most of us may not realize is that the company’s also one of the most LGBT-friendly corporations in the nation: they pay the unfair taxes incurred by gay couples left out of federal marriage tax laws and pay for transgender employees’ reassignment surgeries. And Goldman CEO Lloyd Blankfein put successful pressure on New York State lawmakers to pass gay marriage last year.

Now Blankfein’s lending his face to gay group Human Rights Campaign’s Americans for Marriage Equality ads, which has also produced videos featuring Mo’Nique, hockey player Sean Avery and Senator Al Franken, the Telegraph reports.

“I’m Lloyd Blankfein, chairman and C.E.O. of Goldman Sachs, and I support marriage equality,” Blankfein says in the latest 30-second spot. “America’s corporations learned long ago that equality is just good business and it’s the right thing to do.”

“Join me and the majority of Americans who support marriage equality.”

Considering his past support for marriage equality and his long-time support for equality-minded Democrats, it makes sense that Blankfein would crusade for equal rights from coast-to-coast. But Goldman Sachs’ past, and Blankfein’s role therein, have some wondering if perhaps this commercial is also a public relations ploy. If it is, some observers think it won’t work.

“If Mr. Blankfein was taking a radical stand on pay you could say wow, that’s big. But equality is simply not an issue you associate with Goldman,” Paul A. Argenti, a professor of corporate communication at the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, remarked to the New York Times.

But the apparent distance between Blankfein’s industry and gay rights is precisely why HRC asked him to participate. “Lloyd Blankfein is not someone average Americans would think is going to support marriage equality,” said HRC spokesman Mr. Sainz. “The green visor crowd is not typically associated with socially progressive policies, and this is further proof that a diversity of Americans are coming to the same conclusion.” HRC also gave Goldman Sachs a corporate equality award at a New York City event Saturday night.

Popular opinion of Goldman and Blankfein aside, the CEO has a point: equality is good business. First, opening a company’s doors to all Americans, not just straights, guarantees all Americans receive the opportunity to work—long a right-wing talking point, but one with which most Democrats can agree, I hope. Second, overturning the federal Defense of Marriage Act would help normalize our convoluted tax codes, providing gay couples with extra income to spend on the economy. Further, you signal to queer consumers that you support their national inclusion, while also living up to America’s mantra: equality for all. If more financial giants like Blankfein spoke out on the issue, perhaps they can convince Wall Street’s well-heeled friends, particularly conservatives, that this civil rights fight is worth their time, energy and money.

Ronald Reagan’s birthday reminds Republicans of what they don’t have

February 6th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Today is Republican Christmas: the 101st anniversary of dear ideological leader Ronald Reagan’s blessed birth. To celebrate, the Reagan Ranch Center in Santa Barbara is screening the president’s speeches and films and has waived admission for the day, while the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library will host former Mississippi Governor Haley Barbour and others for a grand event and 21-gun salute. And you can bet your bottom dollar the Republican presidential candidates will give the Gipper a shout out during their various campaign stops today.

The prize for biggest Reagan-obsessed offering, however, will go to Americans for Prosperity. CNN reports that the Koch brothers-backed conservative group spent about $230,000 to air a very special birthday ad comparing Reagan’s optimistic musings with President Obama’s sour-sounding whines about our nation’s economic malaise.

“America remains mankind’s best hope,” Reagan says after Obama gripes about how the “basic bargain that made this country great has eroded.” Similar contrasting soundbites, peppered with images of Reagan supporters, grain and a cowboy, span the thirty-second spot, leading to the AFP’s extra special message to the dead president: “Happy birthday, President Reagan. We miss your optimism. Your love of America.” The subtext of course is that Obama hates America.

The ad comes three weeks after AFP aired an ad accusing Obama of political wheeling and dealing for bankrupt solar panel company Solyndra. Using Reagan will probably have more resonance for Republican voters, but it may also remind them how little they actually like their current crop of presidential candidates: a Pew Research poll from January 30 showed majority — 52% — of Republican or GOP-leaning voters rank the field as fair or poor.

Ron Paul hopes delegates can give him the last laugh at Republican convention

February 6th, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

Ron Paul probably felt a bit bruised Sunday morning. The White House hopeful has spent 6 months building up his Nevada campaign. Their thousands of volunteers wooed the Silver State’s large service industry and Mormon blocs, and spent $869,650 on ads leading up to this weekend’s caucus. A first place finish seemed like a long-shot, but a strong second appeared within reach. Sadly for him, Paul finished third, but it wasn’t really that big of a loss: with 18.8% of the voters, he fell only 2.3 points behind Newt Gingrich’s 21.1% points. Mitt Romney, as if you couldn’t guess, placed first with 50.1%, according to the AP.

But this weekend’s showing isn’t all bad news for Paul. He did manage 8.8 more points than Rick Santorum, proving he still has a place in the race. And the Washington Post reports Paul dominated among voters whose first priority was finding a “true conservative” president, rather than, say, the economy or being able to beat Obama, categories where Romney consistently won.

The entrance polls show about one in five voters said the most important attribute they want to see in a candidate is that he is a “true conservative.”

Among those voters, Romney took just 4 percent — a showing that lends credence to the idea that there is room for a true conservative alternative.

But those voters didn’t spurn Romney for Gingrich or Santorum; instead, they went for Paul, who won the demographic with about 40 percent.

Now, it’s fair to point out that Nevada is one of the more libertarian states in the country, so it’s not surprising that Nevada Republicans’ idea of a “true conservative” might be different from other states.

Paul didn’t win very conservative voters overall — Romney took 49% — but the fact that Nevada’s “true conservative” voters are Libertarians like Paul speaks to the ongoing evolution of the Republican Party, an evolution for which Ron Paul’s largely responsible. The socially conservative moralism of the past has competition from Paul and his ideological allies’ small government, live and let live philosophy. Paul hopes to use 2012 to finally weave his political legacy into the Grand Old Party’s official platform.

Sorry to sound like a broke record, but Ron Paul will not be the next president. He won’t even be the Republican nominee. It’s definitely possible, however, that he’ll have enough delegates to guarantee a place at this summer’s convention in Tampa. And Paul clearly has his eyes on the prize. “I want to maximize delegates, and so far we’ve been able to pick up delegates,” the candidate said at a campaign event in Minnesota, where he flew before Nevada’s caucus had even been called. And he told reports he has “no doubt” he can get to the convention, according to the Wall Street Journal.

Paul currently has a paltry six 8 out of 131 counted delegates at the moment (Romney has 81) but there are 100 at stake over in the Maine, Colorado and Minnesota events being tallied over the next week. Strong showings in those and other states leading to March’s Super Tuesday could put Paul on par with Gingrich and Santorum’s respective 27 and 15 delegate totals. Trouncing Santorum in these races would be especially helpful for Paul and would make clear to the party as a whole that Paul deserves a starring role at the convention. And it’s there that he hopes to put his final stamp on the Republican Party: an audit of the Federal Reserve.

From the San Francisco Chronicle:

If [Paul] follows through on a promise to remain in the race and collect delegates until the party’s convention in August, he could gain the clout needed to highlight his signature goal of curtailing the power of the central bank.
“He’s going to ask for a speaking role at the convention and try to have some influence in the party platform,” Republican strategist John Feehery said of Paul.

That would likely mean adding some tough anti-Fed language to the party’s formal agenda, such as mandating an audit of its monetary policy or sharply curtailing its power by eliminating its task of promoting employment so it focuses exclusively on price stability.

“The main things you could get Republicans to sign off on are removal of the dual mandate or an audit of monetary policy,” said Mark Calabria, a former senior Republican staff member of the Senate Banking Committee who is now director of financial-regulation studies at the libertarian Cato Institute in Washington. “Those are the sort of things Ron Paul could look at trying to get in the Republican platform.”

It’s unclear how deeply involved the Republican Party will allow Ron Paul to be in crafting their agenda, but his clear support at the ballot box should signal that the Congressman has a following that must be brought into the party’s larger fold lest they alienate a growing voter bloc. Regardless of Paul’s actual legislative success, his placement at the convention — sure to be prominent — will mark the pinnacle of his 36-year-long congressional career. The Texan, getting up in years, will have made his case in the grandest way possible, possibly for his final presidential contest. (Sure, he may run in 2016, if Obama wins a second term, but it seems more likely his son Rand will take the lead.)

Presidential campaigns are not always about winning. Gay Republican presidential candidate Fred Karger clearly doesn’t stand a chance, but his candidacy is aimed not at the White House, but at changing the hearts of an historically homophobic Republican Party. Stephen Colbert’s political activity too is about sending a message. Ron Paul’s campaign is also largely symbolic, though on a far larger and increasingly mainstream scale, and one that may very well have ramifications for years, if not generations, to come.

Why ‘The Walking Dead’ comic is better than the AMC series: ‘Something to fear’

February 3rd, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

There are still nine days until “The Walking Dead” series comes lurching back to finish its sophomore season on AMC. That’s more than enough time to tear through the 93 issues of the comic book upon which it’s based.

At about 22 pages each, 93 issues may sound like a lot of material, but it’s not. It’s never enough, actually. The mostly monthly serialized narrative is above and beyond far more effective than the televised version. Though made of black-and-white ink, not flesh and bone, Robert Kirkman’s characters capture the real horror of the zombie era, a reality in which you’re forced to fight for your life against both flesh-eating doppelgangers, other men and yourself. How far will the characters, or you, go to survive? The answer will horrify you.

Man’s gruesome nature will surely be revealed as “The Walking Dead” comics’ latest arc, “A Larger World,” unfolds over the next seven months. Kirkman and his publishers at Image Comics released this teaser image today: a man — possibly increasingly unhinged Rick? — holding a blood-dripping chainsaw, invoking flashbacks of cannibal Leatherface. The tagline: “Something to fear.”

Newsarama passed along Kirkman’s remarks on the chilling teaser image: “After Rick and the other survivors are brought into a larger world, they are given something to fear.”

In the most recent issue, Rick lamented how unfazed he has become to his new reality, how it’s too familiar and combating zombies has become rote. He’s obviously about to remember what true terror feels like, or maybe dole it out himself. The reader, meanwhile, will have little choice but “watch” in captivated horror. Seriously, I dare you: pick up the first three issues of “The Walking Dead” comic and try not to consume the remaining 90. For those of you who aren’t into it, the series returns on February 12th.

Here’s a full look at the teaser image for the “A Larger World” story arc.

$500,000 worth of weed found off California coast

February 3rd, 2012 by Andrew Belonsky

What a waste. Some poor schlub, perhaps trying to get rid of evidence, lost 30 bales of marijuana worth an estimated $500,000 in the Pacific Ocean off the coast of Marina del Rey, California. The water-logged stash was discovered by sheriff office’s investigators Wednesday, and was recovered later in the week by lifeguards, who then turned the bud booty to customs officials, the LA Times reports.

This scene reminds me when Celia Hodes dumped Nancy Botwin’s stash in her pool on Showtime’s “Weeds.” Nancy, of course, later moved — after Guillermo burned down her entire suburb — to a place called Ren Mar, California, a fictional town that somewhat resembles Marina del Rey. Coincidence or conspiracy? Probably just a coincidence, but if you’re high and paranoid, maybe you’ll think the latter.

Image via doubl’s 23HQ page.